My oldest flung himself on the couch this morning, just minutes before the bus arrival and in the most dramatic form he can muster whines, “Mooooom! Why can’t it be Friday or Saturday already?” “Why isn’t it September yet when my birthday is?” This is only the third week of school, but with the leisurely pace of summer quickly fading and the realities of difficult work ramping up, this Thursday morning he woke up feeling like he can’t make it through the two days remaining of the week. He also really wants a few nice gifts for his birthday and he wants them now. As an adult, I chuckle a little and also empathize. He wants to jump ahead to the fun birthday activities we have planned for my brother’s birthday on Saturday. He even mentioned swapping birthdays with my brother so his could be sooner. He wanted to skip over the tedious and sometimes grueling work of school in between.
I have had many days as a working and stay at home mom where I wished the week away and would rather it be Friday or the weekend. So the cycle of time continues. But when I was in college, I had a professor warn us of the dangers of wishing away time. It can be an interesting coping strategy when life is difficult, to wish we were at the next pleasant moment in time, but very dangerous at inhibiting our growth in the present. There is much to be learned in hours, minutes and seconds between the elated moments of our lives, but our tendency is to long for the next thing that will make us happy. As Christians we like to talk about the lofty ideas of surrender and self sacrifice, but we are incredibly hesitant to embrace with wonder and awe the difficult, monotonous and sometimes boring moments of the in between where a true dying-to-self occurs. Our professor mentioned that if our thoughts are focused on the future, we cannot absorb and truly learn all of the lessons in the present. It take a shear act of the will to stay and absorb the present moment.
In a very digitally addicted world, I am constantly tempted to escape moments with my children or even the pauses and spaces of rest in my alone time to zone out my mind on a device. It is a desire to be anywhere else besides the present moment.
It’s interesting that the times God has most spoken into my heart are the moments where I surrender to the present and sit in silence to listen. When I worked outside of the home, I remember longing for the part of the day when I had lunch or a planning period to escape the stresses of teaching. While a stay at home mom now, I long for the times when my kids will take a nap or when my husband returns home so I can have a break. There is nothing wrong with those desires, but if they cloud the moments in between, then you are missing the beauty and wonder that God has purposefully placed for you to discover in the day. For example, my children won’t say their first words or take their first steps while napping. I never got to experience a student having a lightbulb moment or grasping a difficult concept during my lunch break. But there were thousands of moments before each of those breakthroughs. Thousands of repeating words to my children. Thousands of times lifting my child, and encouraging them when they crawled or pulled up on something. God has been leading me to believe that all the growth and time in between the moments of elation is where the truest and holiest work of the cross begins.
As Christians, we want to skip to the places of victory, where the growth has already occurred and the refining fires that we must walk through to grow have been extinguished. But I love the compassion and understanding God has in this verse in Deuteronomy 7:22:
“The Lord your God will drive out these nations before you little by little. You will not be able to destroy them all at once; otherwise, the wild animals will become to numerous for you” (NIV).
He gave the Israelites a vision of their future and a promise that it would be fulfilled. But He warns them here that it won’t happen all at once. He knew that if he gave them too many victories too quickly, then the land would be overwhelmed with beasts that could not be tamed. The civilizations that remained may have felt so defeating, but God left them to take care of the land and the wild animals while he worked on the Israelites hearts and helped them grow in the in between. God may have revealed some purposes and plans for your life. He may have given sweet promises in your heart, and I promise you friend, if He spoke them, He will fulfill them. Just not all at once. Let me say that again, it won’t happen all at once. We want to skip ahead and have all that God has planned for us completed, but He knows there is still growth that happens in the in between and our hearts would be overrun with the wild beasts of our characters flaws and sin if we skip the periods of growth.
So today don’t mentally skip ahead. Let’s go one day at a time embracing surrender and asking God to reveal himself in the in-between moments. In the moments that are the most difficult to you, where you don’t want to linger and that tempt you to open your phone and escape just one more time. For one day friends, try it with me and whisper this prayer:
Lord, Help me not to wish away my time. You have numbered my days on this earth and I have a lot of growing to do. God help me to set aside my forms of escape when the moments are difficult today. Help me to take a deep breath and truly embrace the surrender that comes in the in between. Help me to surrender my anxiety, my fear, my anger, my stress. Help me to live in the present right now, in this moment, no matter how difficult, and reveal to me how I can grow. In Jesus’ Name Amen
